A Millennium Bug Comes To Visit

Milo spent a week with me and my life has not been the same.
I was asked to save his exploits, so that they may always live on in the realm of blogland.
I think the Bug would approve.

A Most Peculiar Delivery.......

Yesterday I went out on the porch and discovered THIS!

The box was colorful, with many things that looked familiar;
artists I have seen and admired....

...Exotic places and postcards....
And that is one of Manon's hearts,

It gave a thump and a bump as I was admiring an acorn...

Oh and the lovely drawings and a little princess too!
Well, I was unfortunately in a hurry to get the car in for service,
so this delightful and mystical box was set upon my work table to
open later in the day.

Much later in the evening,
(I admit, I forgot about it)
I discovered THIS:

Although the studio had been empty, someone
had been very busy......

Hmmmmmm, this is looking vaguely familiar.....

.....That looks like a hand,
and an antennae,
and could that be the top of a hat?
The little pompom on a toque?

Well, I think I'd better leave well enough
alone for the time being, although
that hand could explain the
thumping and bumping......

Ooooohhhh my....
What shall I find

More Mischief, or, Is This *MY* Studio Anymore???

Well, I must admit I am scratching my head this morning as I post this to the blog. I come into the studio and find someone has made themselves right at home........a vintage pillowcase, a featherbed, and one of my BEST hand sewn miniature quilts. So I figure, okay, someone needs some shut eye.......I've been there.
I'll just work on my computer instead.

And then I find this little surprise.....computer booted up and a request (order?) for me.....

Well, all I can say is things are going to be interesting.....I wonder if I am allowed to use my studio???
Maybe if I am very quiet and only have a few lights on.
Hmmmmmm.........what do you think?

Oh Boy.........

What can I say??? He must get up at night and have a ball on this thing! Not picky either....cocoa, whipped cream, porcelain cup and a silver spoon. Can I manage that......

Okay, I have to check the studio for bugs....or more precisely...A BUG.

Odd Things A-Foot.......

Sometimes you just suspect that something isn't quite right....you know, that feeling that someone has moved your chair, toyed with your desk, been nosing about. So I decided to get my night vision camera set up and see what the HECK was going on in the studio after-hours.....

Yep, just what I thought....getting a leg up from the computer wipes, up the desk chair and from the desk to the book case....

....Groping Frida and enjoying it....sigh....and I think he is sleeping??? No wonder he sleeps all day! Deb, is he nocturnal???

Hanging with Mick, and mind you, I had things to pick up this morning from this little adventure. Good thing he didn't wreck my hand made Cap'n Jack card....that would have been war for sure. Get that spare parakeet cage and keep tabs on him. Hmmph!

Obviously fascinated by little-but-mighty Rawwwr!!! Now there is a pair. I think Rawwwr can hold his own.....

Oh no! I was afraid of this! Waaaaaay too high! How did he not fall off? Nope.....don't want to know.....bugs!

The night vision camera doesn't show the peacock too well, but Milo is completely enthralled with the color and feathers, and that is waaaaaaaay too high for a little bug to be standing! You're going to......

Thank heavens for those Misfits shoe laces I never got in my Doc Martens! *Whew* I think I know how my mom felt when I would take off on adventures. Oy. Pass the nerve tonic please!

And then this is what *I* see in the morning. Nice little bug, all snug in bed, sleeping off the mischief from the night before. What a little stinker!
So, tomorrow is Sunday, and I will be at church......I wonder if I will have a house left? Evidently he hasn't found the garage door yet.
Be still my stomach.......
I think come Monday, Milo is going to be doing some chores.
Life in the country is not a party! A little bit of work around here will get him straightened out......

I Can NOT Believe This!!!

Well, here we go again. I cannot believe this. No wonder he is worn out.....Sweet Pea helped with the *Night Cam* so some of the pictures are a little fuzzy, but that's what you get with night-vision equipment. I can't afford military-quality goods......

OMGosh!!!! Does that say what I think it says??? Bug porn......BUG PORN???? On my computer? What on earth is this little guy trying to DO to me? He shouldn't be Googling that!

Oh dear, oh dear......this is no better. Sensitive readers, you might want to depart the blog now. I am sure this one is Naked Bug Chicks.......I can only apologize. I do have to sleep, and I can't do it during the day. Milo......

MILO!!!    (I refuse to comment on what I think is going on....look away, just look away)

I had wondered why the top of my printer/copier was open this morning.....Milo, are you going to do what I think you are?

Yep, there goes the scanning light......aw geeeeez!!! Bug butt on the copier glass......

Exactly what I thought. Someone seems awfully eager to get to the copy. I wonder how much ink I have left........sigh.......

Nooooooo......not again. What is he Googling this time? (oh my gosh, oh my gosh...)Dare I look???

Okay, this is not as bad, but not the way I think he should be meeting other bugs.....I mean, you never KNOW what is on the other side of the computer screen.
"Handsome Bug Seeks Girl Bug"
I'm surprised he stopped there, and did not add other more descriptive details......at least he's holding one of my hearts, so perhaps he is looking for a longer term relationship.


And then again.......maaaaaaaybe it's just a good time someone is looking for. DANG!!! (how did he get to the beer fridge??? oh....never mind......)
I am flabergasted!!!
All this, on a Sunday no less!
Milo, we need to have a talk tomorrow..........
With bright lights and strong black coffee.
And maybe an aspirin.

A Little Time To Talk With Milo.....

After the previous posts, I was not sure what humor I would  find Mr. Milo M. Bug in.....that last night-cam shot was pretty disastrous, at least for a person MY age.
But when I went to wake him this morning, he was just a little groggy and looking fairly sweet, even if a bit bleary around the edges.

"Milo, I have a cup of cocoa for you and an aspirin if you need it....."

I heard a slightly muffled "Thank you...." as the bug sat up and tried to get his walking legs under himself.

"You know, we have a few things to discuss......." I said gently because the little tike was wobbling a bit, and hey---all of us have celebrated just a TAD TOO MUCH at least once in our lives, eh?
I helped him up to his cup and sat across from him and, having never had to do this with children, ask *the questions*. (you know what I mean.....)

"Milo, you're a charming young bug, but I want to know where you learned about, ummmm, you know? The things you were looking up on the internet?"

Dead silence.
"Come on.....Deb's going to expect an answer from me on this one. Where did you hear about looking that stuff up on-line?"

Milo was still eyeing the cup, and trying to avoid answering, but I did not give in. I think he knew it was fess-up time.

"Well," he said, "When I was on my way here, I could hear guys talking about all sorts of things. Some of them were talking about *IT*. And I wondered what they meant. So I figured if you didn't know I was checking it out online, everything would be okay. I'd just pretend to sleep, and then see what was around here."
I still did not say anything.

"So the first night it was just a lot of FUN running through your studio...."
I sighed, "Yes, I can understand that. I have fun there too---but you could have gotten hurt with some of the things you did, you know?"
He shook his head. "Nope. I'm a bug and have an exoskeleton, so I wouldn't get broken bones. I might have gotten tangled up, but I don't break easy. I could get squished though....I think. But it would have to be something really big or tall to squish me," he added as an afterthought.
"Okay," I said, "The second night---I'm not going to have to have the computer taken in for debugging or to get things removed that shouldn't be there, am I?" And I really wanted a straight answer on this one because I have a LOT of material on the computer.
Milo blanched a little, sucking down the cocoa.

"Well, I just thought it would be nice to have a girlbugfriend. And I heard those guys say that there were lots of women to get online. But you had to PAY on all the sites!" He looked down and sort of seemed.....embarrassed?

"And I don't have money because I'm just a bug."
Now, I know I'm supposed to be the tough mom here, but this was hard to take.
"Milo, swear to me you're telling the truth---I mean it."

"I am! I am! But I did copy my butt on your copier cause I saw that in a movie once and wondered what it was like to do......am I in trouble?"
(Oh man, I am 50 and I just realized I have no parenting skills! And I am finding this out very quick!)
"Look Milo, here are the ground rules. No unsupervised computer time. Period. No getting up at night unless you need a drink of water, and if you behave and we can get some things done around here, then I can give you an allowance. You help me out, and you'll earn some money and then when you meet a NICE girlbugfriend, you'll be able to take her for, oh, gummy worms or whatever it is you like. Okay?"
Then he flashed that charming smile and nodded yes, and I knew I was sunk.  What a bug.
"So how about if we take it easy today, and get you settled down, then tomorrow, we can cut the grass and you can help with the John Deere. Does that sound good? Because I am sure you need a bath and want to unpack and get a little more comfortable....."
And I am thinking to myself, he is already quite comfortable and could care less about settling down.

"Okay. That sounds good." His little bug-butt was crawling off the table when he peeped back up and said, "Mom told me I would like you!"

"And thank you for knitting me my own little afghan. It's awfully nice and cozy!!!"
And there he was, all eyes, antennae and smile.
Ay-yi-yi. I know who is really in charge here, and it's not me!

Mowing Day With Milo

For a little bug, Milo seems to have had a lot of experience in different areas. Over breakfast this morning I asked if he knew how to run a John Deere and I got a very enthusiastic *YES*!!!
Ten minutes later, here he was, in his mowing clothes, ready to take the wheel. I was still having doubts.......

I've never run the tractor from this position, and I was still wondering if he had told me the truth about being on one of these. I'm not sure how much yard Deb has but I am thinking there is not an acre of rough ground.......Milo, wake up!!!

"Now, Milo," I asked again, "You're sure you can handle this and help? This is a lot of horsepower and it's a manual shift. You'll have to let me shift....."
"Oh yes! That's fine! Let's get going!!!" the little bug replied.

There was something in that enthusiasm that didn't sound quite kosher.
"Milo, my little friend, you are POSITIVE that you can help run this??? Because if you can't, you need to tell me now."
He still seemed pretty eager.
"Ummmmmm, yep. I think I can handle that engine." And I see him peering down at the exposed parts before I dropped the cowling for the start.
I'm beginning to wonder......

"Can we have a picture of us?" he asked before I started the beast up.
"Sure Milo, here, look at the camera and give it your best farmer face!"
He was playing with his glasses, trying to look sexy. I'm still worried about the mow.

And we're OFF!!!  So far, so good, but it's in first gear and we are not in the yard yet.
(I let him think I had my hand there as a backrest, but I was pretty sure he would fall off....)

Cowabunga dude! Fourth gear and he is squirming away, turning that wheel like a maniac!

"Milo! There's a tree there; you might want to turn...."

I'm trying to shift gears but no luck.
"MILO! There's a TREE straight ahead! TURN!!!!" But we just keep going.........

"MILO!!!! TURN NOW!!!!!" But alas, it was at this point that I realized he wanted to GO to the tree and we were....at a rather alarming speed.

And the next thing I heard was tree branches, the mower grinding to a halt and both of us ending up in different positions than when we had started.

Oh my lord......he's knocked himself for a loop and I have a few battle scars too.....up to the porch we go.

"Milo??? Do I need to call the medics? Are you okay??? Answer me!"

When he opened those shiney little bug eyes, I knew he was okay.  But there was a little issue to get right.
"Milo, you've never been on a tractor before, have you?"
He slowly shook his head *no*.
"You know that's lying. I would have let you ride but not steer. It's a dangerous piece of equipment---you could have been killed and what would I tell Deb?"
There was a pause, then he just smiled and said, "Well, that I love her?"
How can I get mad at that??? "Okay, stay here in the shade and let me get the mower out of the tree and finish the yard. DON'T MOVE......okay?"
He nods yes. And I mow.
However, when I am done and check on him...well......he had moved.

"I'm really sorry,"he said. "I just never had a chance to try that and it looked fun. So I hope you forgive me, and while you were working, I picked these just for YOU!"
Another smile.
"They're the same color I am! Do you like them?"
I sighed and took the bouquet.
"Yes Milo, I like them very much. Thank you. How about we call it a day, all right?"
"Yep! I need to get ready for tomorrow!!!" And he took off at a good clip for the house. All the while I'm thinking....I need to get ready for tomorrow too.....where's my nerve tonic??? (ah yes, he drank most of it the one night........oy! Bugs!!!)